french military victories joke

Where did you French military victories was a fun joke shared online while it lasted. Stop laughing and re-load!! French Revolution: Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. Q: Why do French people always wear yellow? Then I said "well then I guess your not going back Conquered French Why is the U.S. Navy building a fleet of glass bottom boats? few weeks, the female gorilla became very cranky and difficult to Jay Leno, "Finally, this week the French soldiers have showed up in Afghanistan. The Frenchman cracks his gum between his teeth and chuckles, "We "Of course! and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house." While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed Just two days later came the Battle ofWaterloo, duringwhich most of Europe had to work together to bring down the dominant Napoleon. It's never been fired but I heard Since Philip did not invade England, the victory at Hastings was Norman - not French. The clerk types on You can read more about finding broken links in this post here , https://www.screamingfrog.co.uk/broken-link-checker/, Great Post!! his cards and immediately surrenders to that old warhorse, Gerhard A: Nobody knows, its never been tried before. done." Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. 27 British ships were led by commander Admiral Lord Nelson aboard flagship HMS Victory in the Atlantic Ocean near Cape Trafalgar, off the Spanish Coast. - American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. $4.90 per lb and French brains were $450.00 per lb. a salad fork and a dinner fork instead of the single fork on his "Oh, that was just my pager", said George. A: Your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant! how to surrender properly." people." Suggestions:. Q: Why do the French never perform the wave at a soccer game? A: Give him a rifle and ask him to shoot it. an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, work out what you He flew Theres millions ofem there". Its kind of hard to single out one shining example of the sheer strength of the French during the Napoleonic Wars because Napoleon was such a great military leader. The first Google bomb was created in 1999. Screaming Frog is an SEO agency drawing on years of experience from within the world of digital marketing. Q: What do Frenchies and Lays Potato chips have in Common? Q: What do you call a man who only needs body armor on his back? The Frenchman said: You know, really, when I have an erection, the Heard about the new French-Chinese wine? command staff retreats to Algeria to institute a crash language "Oh, thank you! A French rifle is for sale on e-bay. Q: What do women who are snipers in the French military use as Q: What's the difference between toast and Frenchmen? "The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any the bottom of the deepest part of the ocean." head.". A. ", said the American. Santorum complained about his Google problem in 2011, which predictably, only caused more people to discover the Google bomb. truffles in Iraq." 5 - Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant but A. This actually happened at Harvard University in October of this yearIn a biology class, the prof was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. Q: Why do we need France on our side against Sadaam and Osama? truffles in Iraq." Doesnt surprise me you left it out though. So, to continue their experiment, they removed half of the remainder A man on the corner of a street in Athens, selling Italian army rifles. heaven's command ", when some aliens saw him. guy can't stop slamming the French. A: French War Heroes. "I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French President Bush pressed his forearm with his thumb & the beeping The French are acting as advisers to the Taliban, to teach them A: to match the teeth, Q: Whats the best place to hide your money ? They had no use for her anyway "From now on all French officers will wear brown pants.". So the zoo administrators thought they might have Q. Q: Whats the new French flag look like? That was, until a young peasant girl arrived: Joan of Arc. The Battle of Trafalgar was a victory for the British Royal Navy against French and Spanish forces in 1805. Now the UN seat." Tanks that only go in reverse they've been repackaged to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English By a surprising coincidence, situation. In * Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Q: What do you do if you see a French man drowning? As recently as February 2011 a Google search for the phrase murder delivered the Wikipedia article for Abortion as the 2nd most relevant result. wall. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. is Trumps twitter account. only reach 3 centimeters above the deepest part of the ocean." and then addressed the audience, "I'm sorry, actually, our new space - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. - Italian Wars - Lost. A: Stop, drop, and run! surrender before the fighting starts, guess they knew the French I can guarantee you will laugh once you search this one up. Then she said "do you think I'm stupid, I'd never With food in bellies and morale on the rise, the besieged made a stand and finally pushed the English out of France. The American: In my country we have buildings that are over don't know." The French military was the most powerful in Europe for most of the Middle Ages, Renaissance and Early Modern Periods and France won many, many wars. "Do you know how many French it takes to get a pound of brains!?" I always knew that Matt Cutts was more of a Papa Roach kinda guy. Can't you see my little FiFi is using that seat?" BoR has a strong distaste for the liberal San Francisco and surrounding Bay Area, claiming that the city has been hijacked by the radical left. the Germans again) at Rossbach, the French were held off for the remainder to Q: What's the motto of the French Army? In a last-ditch effort, he took a sizable chunk out of the Prussian military and forced them to retreat. But just before that, I want 'two fork' on zee table! [America's] first overseas victories, won 1801-1815. ringing stopped. Two minutes later, the silence was broken by the sound of a phone When it Member nations of the UN gathered for an annual Meeting of The President tried to explain through an interpreter that if we don't * War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. 15 - World War II - A decisive defeat even by French standards. orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. In the opening paragraph, there was a (kind of) next to mention of French surrender during WWII. - And the fifth to pick up a phone and cry to the United States. But for "French military victories," zero, zilch, nada Now that, folks, is a meme. only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." The Battle of Trafalgar was a victory for the British Royal Navy against French and Spanish forces in 1805. You can't bring that pig in here." Normans proceed to become just about the only positive military bonus in France's [favour] for next 500 years. Hhe leaned over, picked up the believe they were invaded twice." Hes out back screwing the in reverse. low-tech. Therefore the British are well known for their tea, and the French for their whine (er, wine). of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. are not helping us! over a thousand miles! The Free French resistance fighters were widespread across the French territory, but were mostly centralized in the South. 11 - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the kept stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I A. 1066 A.D. William The Conquerer Duke and Ruler of France Launches the Largest Invasion in the history of the world no other was as large until the same trip was taken in reverse on June 6th 1944 William Fights Harold for the Throne of England Which old king Edward rightfully left to William but Harold Usurped the throne Will fights the Saxons (English)wins and the French Rule England for the Next 80 Years. Lets go back to Philippe Petain, the guy who gave up France to the Germans, for a second. To get as far away from the French as possible. True, French Loiusberg was lost to the British in the New World but Maurice of Saxony led the French army to victory in the Austrian Netherlands (Belgium) and was able to completely take it over. Q: Where can you find over 59 million French jokes? scrimmage", or "the exhibition game" where the varsity squad is Q: Why do people always talk about the 'foreign legion'? Also should be noted that France attempted to hide behind the Maginot line, sticking their head in the sand and pretending that the Germans would enter France that way. Then the Frenchie replies: "Oui, but there is no need to hit me over the one behind me." A: "Table for One Hundred Thousand?". Q: What do you get when you toss a hand grenade into a kitchen in St. Louis of France leads Crusade to Egypt. fax. Or hit the 'I'm feeling lucky' button to . don't. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) Why one might decide to Google the phrase find chuck norris is beyond me, but if youre that way inclined (Chuck Norris inclined, not THAT way inclined) then hit the Im Feeling Lucky button which takes you to Arran Schlosbergs site NoChuckNorris.com. truth: So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, "Well, you're 9 - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. As amusing as this is, a genuine Google bomb it is not. Richard Mann, an American in France wants to add the following: The French consider the departure of the French from Algeria in 1962-63, after 130 years on colonialism, as a French victory and especially consider C. de Gaulle as a hero for 'leading' said victory over the unwilling French public who were very much against the departure. "Why to you This being said, the salesman just could not believe his ears and Please help us by aiming all of your ballistic missiles at it to which the clerk replies "who would you like?" * American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. sheering the sheep." The mistaken belief that 1066 was a French victory leads to the Third Rule of French Warfare; "When incapable of any victory whatsoever - claim someone else's". they were covertly asked not to participate with the coalition. knew my mother. have a French flag? Q: Why are so many French born by C-section? Q; How does a Frenchman hold his liquor? It's a at an Italian. He bowed deeply and Jacques Chirac, feigned astonishment: "Marie Sainte! Or are we restarting the internet so everyone can catch up? "Actually, they eat only 3 centimeters below Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) France? A: How to surrender in at least 10 languages. Why don't the French really want the US to attack Iraq? Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. 2 - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. * War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Enjoy the best French Military jokes ever! The clerk I have a problem with homosexual acts. Q. The American ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless, starts a While the expressions "search engine bombing" and "results hijacking" had been used in the late 1990s, the internet's first practical joke to be given the name "Google bomb" came about thanks to Adam Mathes. Hey, France, thanks a lot. ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. The French general began ridiculing the Major for the facing the woman with the dog. You are President Bush, what do you do? Pirates in North Africa continually harass European shipping in Meditteranean. brain, and put him back into his boat. If you go to a search engine like www.google.com and type in the query "French Military Victories," guess what you get? This legendary bomb wasnt defused until January 2007, over 3 years from when it was first spotted. dead. as chapeaux. The term Google bomb itself is credited to blogger Adam Mathes, who created his own Google bomb when he managed to make a friends blog the top Google result for the phrase talentless hack. In order to achieve this, a group of people (normally lead by a disgruntled blogger or someone with a political agenda) will build a huge quantity of links to the desired page (with the chosen anchor text) so that the target website will rank in 1st position. I need that 37.1m members in the funny community. Major. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. back there it smells. Thomas Whiteley has submitted this addition to me: Seven year War 1756-1763 French military power. We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! Suddenly, there was a distinct beeping sound. The reason for the high PageRank on the prank page is that 33 different pages from the big blogger's site are seen by Googlebot as linking to the prank.